Mindfulness for teens with depression and anxiety (video)
Mindfulness is an essential part of self-care for teens with depression and anxiety. In this video, we talk about the benefits of mindfulness, non-meditation activities, mindfulness meditation, and finish up with a 3 minute guided meditation, so you can jump right into it if you’re interested.
Hi I’m Deborah Gray and this is my son Lawrence.
Um, Lawrence and I both suffer from depression and we found that mindfulness activities can be really helpful.
Um, mindfulness is basically the practice of being present in the moment. So, um, since none of us are really good at, at, you know being in the moment without any practice, um, there are certain activities you can do that can make you better at that. So some of the benefits, especially for people with anxiety and depression, are, um – for depression – so mindfulness activities reduce stress. Stress exacerbates depression, so you always want to get rid of stress in whatever way possible.
And the other way that mindfulness helps with depression is it can help you stop rumination. Rumination is basically a pattern of repetitive thoughts. And usually with depression those aren’t good thoughts. So you want to do whatever you can to interrupt that, that, that constant negative voice in your head and for anxiety –
For anxiety, it, like depression, helps reduce stress. And also it breaks the kind of cycle of anxiety, of anxiety getting worse. I mean it stops it from building and building and building until you get to the point where you’re just completely freaking out.
So, what we’re going to do in this video is we’re first going to talk about non-meditation activities and then we’re going to talk about mindfulness meditation and then at the end, we’ll have a three-minute breathing meditation to help you just jump into it if you want to. If you want to see what it’s like. OK?
So, so, some mindfulness activities that have gotten really popular are – one of them is coloring for adults. So the first adult coloring book that came out, that I know of at least, was the Secret Garden by Johanna Basford. And that was some five or six years ago and it’s just kind of exploded since then.
So you have when we say adult coloring books most of them aren’t like adult coloring books. It just means that they don’t have the like really big areas like they do for kids, where –
Like at a restaurant where you throw some crayons and a coloring thing at kids and say, “Hey if you’re bored do this.” It’s not Mickey Mouse.
Well actually, yeah, they do have some Mickey Mouse ones. But again, what it comes down to is, is the sections, because you’re usually using colored pencils in these adult ones because crayons would be too big.
But I mean, so think about when you were a kid also when you were coloring, how calming that could be, assuming you didn’t get like stressed out by getting it right in the line like some did.
Ugh.
Yeah OK. So I did. So maybe it wasn’t totally calming but if you, even if you were a little OCD, then it still was calming. And for me, you know, we used to do it when we visited my grandparents in Florida, and we’d swim in the morning in the afternoon my grandparents didn’t know what to do with us.
So they threw a coloring book at you.
Well, actually, I think my mom got the coloring books, because I remember, like, the dresses, coloring the dresses of Henry the Eighth’s wives.
Of course, that’s the kind of one she’d get.
Well anyway. But, but, so it’s, it, I mean, well, they were – OK, they weren’t fun but anyway. So they were calming. Sorry – tangent alert. Anyway, so, but some of the ones that have come out are for the adult coloring books. I mean there’s a huge variety. So you have some that are like just pretty ones like The Secret Garden and Johanna Basford’s come out with a bunch of other ones, like under the sea and et cetera.
And then you have, um, some that are, revolve around like cult TV shows or movies. You have, uh –
You have a Doctor Who.
Right, Doctor Who. Game of Thrones. Star Trek.
I still haven’t watched any Game of Thrones.
Um, maybe when you’re a little older. OK.
Sure.
No, seriously. It was on HBO for a reason. Anyway, so, seriously, please.
You can’t stop me.
Just wait a couple of years. OK, one year. Give me one year or so. And then you have the kind of more traditional ones like Thomas Kincaid and Disney. It’s, um – well, Thomas Kincaid’s estate. He’s this artist who does these really pretty – well did – these really pretty paintings.
And, and, you know, like fairies and sugar skulls. And then you have some really kind of out there ones like People of Walmart.
Oh, yeah, I actually remember seeing those.
And Cat Butts and Dog Butts. Oh, and celebrity mug shots.
So, this thing is also that there are some that you may find, with a really pretty simple design, that your mind is wandering, which is actually what you don’t want.
This is mindfulness. And, and the point is to be concentrating on exactly what you’re doing and not having thoughts – other thoughts – intrude. So if you find these are not complicated enough, then you could do some of the more complex patterns like mandalas and, you know, just there are lots that are really, really tiny, so you have to have the focus.
And so, then, another thing that’s kind of similar to that is called Zentangle. And I found out about this when I took a course – a class – anyway, at, at my workplace, on activities for de-stressing. And, um so –
Actually, I think I heard about it once at school.
Oh really?
Yeah. I think one of my friends had this book of just –
Yeah. Yeah, it’s, it’s, um –
I don’t know.
Well, so the, so the good thing about it is – I can’t draw –
Same, same.
And I can’t draw well – so I can’t draw long straight lines especially, or even long curved lines.
Yeah.
So the thing with Zentangle is, though, almost everything is made up of short lines and, like, small circles. And so, it’s, it’s, um, something you can do if you’re not good at drawing.
So, um, for instance, you can see in this picture of a Zentangle design that everything except the shapes that – the, the main large shapes of the, of the burger and the, the cup and like, the, the french fry box are – everything else is made up of, of mainly of short lines and little circles and so, um, uh, so it’s something you could do even if you can’t draw – like us.
Um, so basically, um, it’s – I mean you could just do it yourself, like, just, you know, start doing it yourself and, and create, you know, abstract forms and, you know, that’s obviously perfectly fine, as you could see from the, the picture. Sometimes people turn these into, you know, full pictures or art. So, non-abstract art. And but it’s good to start off with, with a video, so I’ve linked to a video that actually has instructions. So, like, the way people make money on this is the instructions on how to do it.
So, um, but, it’s it’s really pretty interesting. I did it for about 20 minutes and it was pretty absorbing. So, um, so, it’s, it’s something I would definitely suggest trying.
And the other suggestion I have is, um, is, try crafts. Um, I knit, and, um, one of the reasons I started doing it was because – I mean, first of all, I wanted something, because I was on my phone and on the computer a lot, on my smartphone, back in 2005. My Palm Pilot, maybe it was. I don’t remember. Um, and on my computer, and I needed something that was not technical at all.
I just needed something that was not related to technology for, for at least some part of the day. Um, but the other thing was – is that, for instance, when I’m doing lace patterns in knitting, I have to focus on it.
So I have some knitting I can do when I’m watching TV or sitting with people talking, like at Mom and Dad’s house on Thanksgiving.
Yeah, because you don’t want to talk to the family.
No, no it’s not that. Um, it’s not that –
Yes it is. Yes it is.
It’s just that, for me just to sit there and talk – it’s, uh, because of ADHD, I just – it’s not enough for me. I have to do something else at the same time.
But when I want to have a mindfulness activity, um, especially because it’s portable, um, then I do something like – I’ll, I’ll have several projects and I’ll, I’ll use my lace one or one that’s intricate. And then I have to totally focus on that.
Um, anyway, with crafts, what, what – there are so many different crafts you can do. So, um, it can be, um, it can be, knitting. It can be jewelry making. It can be, um, sculpting, woodworking, glassblowing, metalworking. I mean, there’s – just think about, find, you know, trying different crafts and seeing if one, first of all, gives you that sense of calm. So. not necessarily the mindfulness, but just something that calms you.
And then also, it would be good if there’s one where you do have to be totally absorbed in what you’re doing, because then that is, is a great mindfulness activity, and then you have something to show for it at the end.
Like woodworking with the power saw. You don’t want to get your fingers cut off.
Well right, or glassblowing, clearly, uh – same thing.
You don’t want molten glass on you.
So you have to focus completely on what you’re doing.
Um, so, uh, so that was, I think, what my contribution – you were going to talk about mindfulness meditation.
Meditation. What she told me to do in elementary school because I wouldn’t calm down.
Um, ok, mindfulness meditation – because there is just plain old meditation, there’s transcendental meditation, there is the kind where you just sit there and say “Om” over and over, which I tried and, well, it didn’t work, and, or staring at a candle or something. So this is just specifically mindfulness meditation.
Are you done?
Yes, I’m done.
All right.
Um, I mean personally, I use Headspace and I would recommend it to anybody who’s like, trying to like, test it out. Because Headspace is, first of all, well-known. Second of all, it’s actually decent. Well, more than decent, but – I don’t know.
But, um, I use it personally, and I mean, I’ve been slacking on it recently, haven’t been actually meditating. Eh, don’t follow my example.
Well, no, I mean, but, but, that’s the thing is, you’re it’s you’re going to slack. I, I had a couple of weeks where I didn’t do it at all, I mean, and then I just got back into it. It’s not a big deal.
Yeah.
Um, the other thing I just want to make sure to point out is, is, you can use the free version of Headspace –
Yeah.
For quite a few days, and it leads you through the process of, of mindfulness meditation. So it’s very helpful with that. Also, Calm is another one that’s really good.
Yeah. I mean. I, uh, I started meditation again because I was really stressed about school, and it’s actually helped me not be as stressed, because I, I started when I was like, completely swamped with work. I had so much stuff, I was really behind because I am incredibly lazy and don’t do my work on time.
Um, and so I started meditating, I calmed myself down. I figured out, “Alright, I gotta do this, this and this.”
And I, I wasn’t as stressed, because at school, before I started meditating, I was just sitting there, um, just thinking, “OK, I have no idea what to do. I’m really behind, I’m going to fail.”
Oh, that’s like those, that, ruminating.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I started meditating. It actually, um, it actually worked for me.
You had one just last week, you had a situation, you got really stressed over preparing for a test –
And it wasn’t because I, uh, you know, prepared for a test. It’s because I failed it spectacularly.
OK, well, it’s, well, yeah. But you have to ex – I mean the thing is, you can retake tests in his school.
Yeah.
So, so, it’s like, he was frustrated about, you know, failing –
I got a 2 out of 10.
Yeah, so –
And I wanted to die.
Right. So, but instead of just staying there and being stressed, you –
I actually meditated.
He put his head down on his desk and meditated.
So, um, you can also just do it almost anywhere.
Yeah.
You know, as needed.
Although, personally, I’d recommend somewhere where there isn’t, uh, I don’t know, like, airplanes constantly going over, trains passing by, motorcycles.
Well, actually, that reminds me of, of something, is –
Although, although, that does, um, help you work on the skill of doing it even when there is a lot of noise.
Right. Um, because I do it at work and I do it at lunch. I’m in an open office and people are doing stuff at lunchtime, so what I do, actually, is I have a, uh – it’s white noise, but I actually use – it has a different, a variety of different noises – white, pink, brown noise, um, babbling stream, um, rain –
White, pink and brown.
Trucks, the sound of a truck. Um, so I have that running in the background when I’m doing, um, Headspace, because it helps block out those other noises, and so it keeps me from being startled by a noise and, and kind of getting jolted out of my thing.
So, um and there are a couple of points you wanted to make about, um, about mindfulness meditation.
Mm hmm.
I would personally say it’s probably better to do the longer ones like, some Headspace, uh, things there’s like the three minute, five minute, ten minute…some of them are like –
Fifteen, twenty.
Ten, fifteen, thirty.
Yeah.
And while that’s daunting, like, it –
Well, you’re not starting out with that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Obviously, like, if you’re still just starting off, you do the three minute, do the five minute and then do – work up to the ten minute and work up to the 30 minute. In some cases it’s daunting, sure. It’s like, “I’m going to spend half an hour meditating? Jesus Christ.” And that, uh, yeah.
That, okay –
It isn’t, it isn’t –
But you work up to it.
Yeah.
You work up to it. The, and, yeah, I mean, and this is, this is, um, this is like learning a sport and getting, and getting your muscles toned by practicing and doing the sport. And, um, eventually you do get to that point where it’s easier –
Yeah.
– then it is harder, you know. So, um, so, it’s, uh, it’s you know, and again, you know it may be something that doesn’t work for you, um –
Not guaranteeing it.
Well, right. But you definitely want to try it for at least a couple of weeks before you give up on it because you’ll have some good days and some bad days. You know, I had, uh – the last couple of weeks I have been completely distracted during my meditation. So like, the last 10 sessions. And before that, I had some fantastic sessions. I mean, I like, actually felt really light, I started feeling really light and everything –
Yeah, I know.
– is really, really nice when it’s working.
Hey, you know, so sometimes it doesn’t work. It’s not going to be a straight line where you’re just gonna keep going up and up and up and better and better and better.
Yeah, your progress ain’t gonna be a straight line.
So, your progress, you know, you do well and then you’ll have you know a certain period time where you’re not doing well.
Yeah, like I’m in now where I’m not doing any meditation whatsoever.
Yeah, well, you can’t do much worse than that.
But the thing is, is, that it’s still – even if you’re not reaching that point where you’ve, you’re perfectly focused, it still feels good after you come out of it –
Yeah.
– you know, and you can use those short ones, the three minute, like breath meditation or body scan meditation for something like, you know, when Lawrence used it for being frustrated about the test.
Yeah, when I was on the verge of throwing my computer across the room. Uh, there’s a specific one or, there’s a specific pack on Headspace called S.O.S. which is, like, meant to be if you’re, like, something just happened to you, like, either feeling a lot of anger or a lot of sadness, you know, it doesn’t matter. That, that’s what I used and I calmed down, and then I, uh, then I used another one, which I can’t remember which one it was.
But, but, it’s definitely worth trying. I mean, it’s so ubiquitous now, you, sometimes you just want to, like, gag when you see another, another claim about what mindfulness does and everything. But, you know, you got, you’ve got to just ignore all the hype and get down to what it really is and what it can do, and, um, it’s, it’s…you know, I mean, I’ve got ADHD. I never would’ve thought I’d be able to meditate.
So, um, the other thing is, is after you’ve gotten, um, uh, the tutorials on either Headspace or Calm and you don’t want to, you want to keep doing it, but you don’t want to do the same ones over and over, and then you don’t want to pay for it. Um, there is one called Insight Timer, an app that’s on both Android and iPhone,, and it’s basically like a platform, a publishing platform for meditation coaches.
So there are literally thousands of, of, um, guided meditations on it, and it’s totally free. You do have to sign up for an account but, there’s, you know, um, that they have paid versions that are more advanced, but you can get tons of really good free guided meditations.
Um, so anyway, I think that, you know – remember that at the end of this video we’re going to do a guided three-minute, um, mindfulness meditation if you want to get started. And so, then I guess that’s it.
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