Ways to Help a Depressed Person

• Listen. Keep in mind that the depressed person isn't communicating well right now, and is probably speaking slower and less clearly. Be patient and don't interrupt.
• Take care of little tasks like feeding the cat or doing the laundry. (This suggestion applies if you don't live with the person. If you do live with the person, you probably have to take on all the tasks).
• Along those lines, remember that the depressed person is not being lazy. Think of when you're really sick and you can barely get out of bed to go to the bathroom. That's how a depressive can feel all the time.
• Learn everything you can about depression. Knowledge is power and understanding.
• Take it seriously if the person talks about suicide. Call their doctor for advice on what to do.
• Make sure the depressive is keeping doctor appointments and taking his or her medication.

Ways to Help Yourself

• Take care of yourself. Depression can be "contagious." Get out and do something for yourself alone.
• Recognize that your feelings of anger, frustration and helplessness are valid. Talk to a therapist for help in dealing with them.
• If you are in a sexual relationship with this person, don't take it personally if they have lost interest in sex. Sexual drive is one of the first things to go when you're depressed. Offer hugging and cuddling without an expectation of sex.
• Know when to let go. After a certain point, especially if the depressed person is not getting help or taking their medicine, there's nothing you can do. You have to move on with your own life.

Web Pages

• The Purple Elephant in the Room: Talking to Someone with Depression
• Best Things to Say to Someone Who is Depressed - Self-explanatory
• Coping with Depression as a Family
• Depression Fallout
• Families for Depression Awareness
• Helping Someone with Depression
• If You Know Someone Who's Depressed
• Self-Help Advice for Depressed Patients: What My Family Can Do
• Suicide Prevention - Sharon Caron
• Ways to Help a Depressed Person - NIMH
• What to Do When a Friend is Depressed: A Guide for Teenagers
• What to Do When Someone You Love is Depressed
• Worst Things to Say to Someone Who is Depressed - Self-explanatory

Mailing Lists

• This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it - Email This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it with the words "subscribe bpso" in the body of the message. Subject line may be left blank. This mailing list is for people who are " in an intimate, loving, caregiving, or nurturing relationship with a bipolar individual. This includes, but is not necessarily limited to, spouses, significant others, parents, children, near relatives and close friends. The important factor is that the relationship is close enough that the subscriber is significantly affected by the disorder. People whose relationships with bipolar individuals have ended are also welcome, so long as they remain concerned with the role played by the illness in that relationship."

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